Soulful Healing

Today’s Mindful Monday post is coming up a little later than usual…  I decided to spend most of my Sunday resting.  I was on overload from a busy week of blogging and business networking.   When the exhaustion really set in on Friday morning, I decided that I needed to walk my talk and institute some down time.  So today’s blog is getting written on Monday evening, instead of Sunday evening

In a guest blog I wrote last week, I talked about how serenity can be found in things we otherwise might label as “mundane”, like our daily and weekly chores.  This inspired me to do a Mindful Mondays post about how to really dive in to the present moment of things we usually try not to focus on too much.  To try this mindfulness tip, pick a chore you need to do this week.  Maybe it’s laundry or washing dishes or mowing the lawn or whatever…  Pick one and join me in the following:

1)  Bring your full attention to the task at hand.  As you begin the task, take note of your five senses.  What do you hear/see/smell/touch/taste?  Observe these senses and describe them to yourself.

2)  Notice your breath.  As you continue with your task, blend your breath with your movement.  If you are washing dishes, for example, breathe in for a certain number of scrubs and then exhale to an equal or greater number of scrubs.  This can be applied to any chore…  Vacuum forward, inhale, vacuum backward, exhale…  Lift laundry out of the washer, inhale, place in dryer, exhale…  Be creative!

3)  Observe how this combination of breathing and movement affects your thoughts and feelings.  Are you able to stay with the present moment and the activity?  How often do your thoughts wander?  What are you feeling?

4)  Remember that above all, this is an exercise in non-judgment.  Mindfulness asks us to simply notice, without passing positive or negative judgment.  I know, easier said than done, but it gets much easier with practice!

In a new community building twist, I’ll post this topic up in the Discussion board on the Soulful Healing page on Facebook.  There, I invite you to discuss whether you tried this mindfulness exercise and your reactions to it.  Thanks for reading and be well!

Do you ever notice yourself mindlessly fidgeting with things during the day?  Maybe twirling your hair, running a finger along an object, tapping a pencil?  These are perfect opportunities to add some mindfulness to your day.  Here’s how to take advantage of the random fidgeting:

1)  First, notice that you are fidgeting with something.  Simply note this without judgment (if judgment arises, “Sheesh, there I go again…” work on releasing that thought)
2)  Exhale fully and inhale deeply, noticing the thoughts, feelings, and sensations accompanying your behavior and current situation
3)  Continue the whatever movement you just noticed yourself engaging in, but with your full attention and awareness.  If you are running your thumb on a shirt button, for example, describe to yourself everything you can notice about the button.  Is it hot or cold?  Does it have a texture?  Are there threads running through it? 
4)  Enjoy your now mindful moment!

Of course, this exercise is not beneficial in all situations.  I might not recommend this in the middle of an important meeting or while driving on the highway, as your attention will be on your pencil/button/necklace and not on the tasks at hand.  However, if you find a moment where it makes sense to practice this, feel free!  Thanks for reading and be well!

No, really, I mean it…  You can use traffic to your benefit!  Whether you live in a large urban area or a town with a slower pace, it is possible to use mindfulness while dealing with traffic.  This idea is an expansion of one given to me by first yoga teacher, 12 years ago.  I wish I could remember her name, so that I could give her credit!  She was teaching a class at my college and she was fond of telling her students that when we encounter a stoplight, we had a choice:  1)  Use it as an opportunity to breathe and be mindful or 2) Get frustrated and anxious about the obstacle placed in front of us.  She would encourage us to choose the first option.

So next time you are faced with an inconvenient stoplight or massive amounts of traffic, try the following:
1)  Notice the automatic chain of thoughts and feelings about this traffic obstacle
2)  Draw your focus to your breath and begin to breath more fully and slowly
3)  Use your slower, mindful breathing to relax the muscles of your face, neck, shoulders, and belly.
4)  See if you can shift your thoughts…  For example, with a stoplight, perhaps say to yourself, “This is my reminder to slow down and pause today.”  Or on the crowded highway during your morning commute, “These people don’t want to be here any more than I do, I choose to have compassion for the other people on this highway today.”

As you practice, you may find yourself smiling at stoplights instead of grumbling.  Have a soulful day!

Deep breathing is key to gaining mastery of our thoughts and feelings.  Why?  Because breathing is one of those things we usually do automatically, like so many other activities we engage in.  There are so many things we simply do on auto-pilot.  From our morning routines, to getting our work done during the day, even to interacting with others…  auto-pilot, lack of awareness, same old same old…  Why would anyone want to bring breath and consciousness into these everyday activities?

1)  When fully aware of the present moment, you can let go of worries and regrets.  The present moment is all you really have.
2)  Deep breathing helps you release the tension you might not even know you’re holding in your body.
3)  Taking the time to breathe can help you appreciate every experience, whether challenging or effortless, for the lessons they teach.

So now that you’re thinking this deep breathing thing might be something worth trying, how to go about getting past the distractions that keep you from doing it?  Here are four things to remember as you delve into your own breath:

1)  Check to see how you currently breathe.  Place one hand on your chest and one hand on your belly.  Is your chest doing all the work as you breathe?  If so, you are probably a chest breather.
2)  Keeping one hand on your chest and one on your belly, try to relax your belly muscles and begin using them to inhale and exhale more deeply.
3)  As you inhale, allow your belly to expand.  As you exhale, use your belly to gently push the air out of your lungs.  This may feel very awkward at first!
4)  As you notice your thoughts and feelings and internal sensations, keep focused on breathing slowly & thoughtfully.  The mind is an excellent creator of distractions, so it may require a stronger effort initially to stay aware of your breath.

Like most things, the more you practice, the easier this deep breathing process will become.  Eventually, it may even become your new auto-pilot, bringing with it greater stillness and focus in every moment.

About three weeks ago, I injured my ankle playing tennis.  I knew well enough to use the combination of rest, ice, and elevation to decrease the swelling and allow it to heal.  I even got myself a neoprene brace to help keep my ankle stable.  But I jumped the gun a little and after a bit more than two weeks post-injury, I started walking around normally on my ankle.  It promptly swelled back up again and started hurting.  I went to the doctor just to make sure I hadn’t really messed it up.  There I received confirmation that I had not given my ankle enough time to fully heal.  Turns out that my ankle has a minor sprain and I would have done well to continue resting it.  Yet another reminder to slooooow doooowwwwwn…  It’s challenging to allow ourselves to be right where we are and love the present moment, so here is this week’s mindfulness tip to help you out:

1)  This takes the mindful walking concept a bit further.  When walking around this week, focus your attention on each step.
2)  Label each of your steps…  left… right… left… right… and make an effort to slow your pace
3)  Once you’ve settled into a slower rhythm, bring your attention to your breath
4)  Match your breath to your steps, at a rhythm that works for you, breathing in for an amount of steps that seems reasonable to you, then breathing out to the same number of steps
5)  Notice your thoughts and physical sensations as you practice this, remembering to release each observation without judgment

Wishing you a health-full week and plenty of time to rest!  Be well!

Fidgeting is a common occurrence in our fast-paced society.  Next time you are among a group of people, notice how many people, including you, are moving some part of their body…  tapping fingers, bouncing knees, biting lips, twirling hair…  The list could go on and on.  Mindfulness can help you feel more centered in your body and reduce this extraneous and potentially distracting fidgeting.

1)  First, you need to notice that you’re actually fidgeting.  Bring your full awareness to your body and to the sensations that prompt you to begin fidgeting.
2)  Use three deep, slow breaths to calm your nervous system and allow your body to settle into stillness
3)  Observe the thoughts and feelings that arise as you work on remaining completely still and focused.
4)  If this exercise provokes in you a stress response and the desire to fidget more, respond to yourself with compassion and allow those feelings to pass through you without judgment.

Let me know how this works for you (or doesn’t!) by leaving a comment below.  Have a mindful day!

Ahhhh, multi-tasking…  The bane of the modern age.  Whether you work at home or a bustling office, you are no doubt frequently called upon to multi-task:  working on one project, the phone rings, someone asks you for something, you need an answer from someone else, you’re hungry and start eating while doing five other things.  No wonder so many of us have a hard time sitting still!  We have no idea what to do with ourselves unless our toes are tapping or keyboards are clacking.

I often hear friends and colleagues say that they “just have ADHD” and can’t do one thing at a time.  My guess is that most do not actually have ADHD (unless of course that has been properly diagnosed by a clinician), but are instead suffering from our cultural phenomenon of too much at once.  While multi-tasking seems to be a sensible solution to having a lot to get done, I propose a better way.  Doing many things at once means you have several incomplete tasks all going at the same time, so where in there is room to see any one thing to its full completion?

In your daily life this week, try the following:

1)  Select one task and choose to mindfully start & fully finish it.

2)  When your mind wanders to all your other tasks, keep bringing your attention back to the task at hand until you are finished with it.

3)  If someone interrupts you with a question or task, try gently explaining that you are working on something else and let them know when you expect to be available.  You may need to practice other mindfulness skills if the person in question is a demanding boss or hungry child or someone with a true emergency!

4)  Allow yourself to move on to the next task only when the previous one is done or you reach an impasse that cannot be quickly resolved (as with test taking, sometimes it’s better to skip something and come back to it when you’ve had time to think).

Enjoy the sense of accomplishment that comes with truly completing each item on your to-do list this week!

Many people think of mindfulness and relaxation as the same thing.  While there are similarities between the two and the use of one can lead to the other, there are some important differences.  Relaxation exercises imply a goal of relaxing a tense body-mind.  Deep belly breathing and progressive muscle relaxation are two examples of specific relaxation skills that can be employed to reduce stress, tension, and anxiety.  Relaxation can lead to mindfulness, because you need to be aware that you are tense, then engage in an activity to reduce that tension.  Through that practice, you begin to understand the difference between a stressed state of mind and relaxed one.

Mindfulness can also bring about relaxation, but it is a skill of a different sort.  With mindfulness, we simply want to bring attention to what the body-mind is experiencing.  Is it thinking?  Remembering?  Ruminating?  Planning?  Dreaming?  Organizing?  Feeling?  Mindfulness asks us to simply notice what we are experiencing and accept that experience without judgment.   It’s that last part that is so challenging.  We learn from an early age to judge, discern, categorize…  Good/bad.  Up/down.  This/that.  Should/shouldn’t.  What is so interesting is that, in seeking to observe ourselves without judgment, we can find a sense of peace and relaxation that expands into all areas of life.

In the spirit of non-judgment, try this strategy:
1)  Bring your awareness to your body-mind throughout your day, maybe at several points during the day.
2)  Using your internal thought process, identify what you are doing with objective, descriptive terms:  Thinking, walking, sitting, worrying, eating, listening, talking, etc.
3)  Notice when and how often you judge yourself during this activity.  And when you do judge yourself (as we all do!), again simply identify that and accept it without further judgment.  Sometimes a long, slow exhale helps increase acceptance of the present moment.

Regardless of the level of challenge this activity presents for you, have courage and keep coming back.  Like any skill, with practice, you will gain proficiency over time.  Be well!

Today’s mindfulness tip covers one of the more subtle ways we hold tension:  gripping the muscles of the jaw and face. Without realizing it, many of us respond to stress by tightening the muscles of the jaw, mouth, cheeks, nose, and eyes.  No wonder our culture suffers from so many headaches…  All those pinched up faces!  Here are some strategies for facing your stress without stressing your face:

1)  The first aspect to any mindfulness activity is noticing that you are experiencing something.  Throughout your day, turn you attention to your face and jaw.  Simply notice the muscles of your face and take note of whether you have chronic tension there.

2)  When you find yourself gripping your jaw & cheek muscles, begin to relax them by slowly allowing your tongue to fall away from the roof of your mouth.  You may notice that your breath can flow more freely as you release your jaw.

3) When you experience tension around your eyes, nose, & mouth, first bring your conscious attention to these facial muscles.  Then use a slow, deep breath to relax them.

4)  You can now use conscious, rhythmic breathing to keep your face & jaw relaxed throughout the day.  When you notice the muscles unconsciously tightening, bring your attention & your breath back to these muscles to release them once again.

Enjoy facing your day and week with greater calm!

Attending to the way we walk is a great way to reconnect the mind, body, and breath.  We usually rush, rush, rush through the many tasks we have to complete in any given day (myself included!).  But there are risks associated with rushing, including but not limited to…  making silly mistakes that then need correcting, forgetting to appreciate yourself & others, tension in the body, and feeling frazzled.  Try slowing just enough to practice this week’s mindfulness exercise:

1)      Select a time when you are walking (at home, work, outdoors, wherever!) and feeling particularly rushed.  Focus your attention on the movement of your legs & feet.

2)      Slow your movement down a bit and feel your feet as they connect to the ground below you.

3)       Notice how the bottom of your feet feel, the sensations along your toes, arches, heels & ankles.  Label those sensations…  scrunched, tight, tingly, numb, relaxed, or another applicable word.

4)      As you practice feeling your feet connect to the ground, also bring some attention to your breath, allowing yourself to be conscious of the rhythm of your breath and movement working together.

Our feet and legs work so hard every day to carry us through all the things we need to get done.  Yet we are almost completely unconscious of this activity, as we think and plan and organize and strategize.  Take an opportunity to slow down and thank your body for the hard work it does.